This is NOT an actual news article. This article was written by me and was originally posted as a joke. Since I doubt now that people will be fooled in the slightest with the debut of Richard Hatch's trailer, I've decided to end the joke. Still, I think it's a pretty funny article so I'm going to leave it posted. It all came about when I thought to myself, "Wouldn't it be funny if Richard Hatch suddenly announced that he wanted to redo Galactica 1980?" So check it out and have a few laughs.


Richard Hatch Says He Wants To Redo Galactica 1980

Fans of the late 70s television show Battlestar Galactica were shocked at the stunning announcement made earlier this week by Richard Hatch, the man who has been the head of the movement to bring back Galactica to the big screen. For years, Hatch (who played Captain Apollo on the show) had been campaigning to revitalize Galactica, but he has now announced he has decided against trying to bring back the original series. Instead, he would like to redo Galactica 1980, the short-lived follow-up series which was universally hated by both Galactica fans and general viewers alike.

"Bottom line, it was a tough decision to make," says the 53 year-old actor. "In the end, it all came down to the issue of financing it. The original show had incredible potential, and yet we barely scratched the surface. But, to be honest, Galactica 1980 also had untapped potential. It was very innovative in the sense that it was the first 'outer space' show that didn't really take place in outer space. That's not an easy thing to pull off, yet somehow they managed to do it. When you consider how costly it is to do a sci-fi film these days, it would certainly save a lot of money if we could do a Galactica movie which takes place entirely on Earth instead of in outer space."

The premise of Galactica 1980 had the Battlestar Galactica discovering Earth with their enemies, the robotic Cylons, right behind them. Earth's technology was too primitive to fight against the Cylons, so the Galactica's crew, led by Colonial warriors Troy and Dillon, attempts to slowly increase Earth's technology while leading the Cylons away from the planet. Most fans were upset with the various scenarios presented on the show. From time travel to the super-powered children known as the Super Scouts, the series quickly became a directionless mess and was canceled after just 10 episodes.

Hatch believes he knows what went wrong with the series. "I think the problem with Galactica 1980 is that it didn't do enough to hook the kids. The 4 to 10 year-old audience is very difficult to impress. My plan is to take the whole Galactica concept and bring it down to the kids' level. I want to water it down enough so it will be simplistic, non-threatening, educational and fun for the whole family."

Glen Larson, the creator of Galactica, was outraged at the news of Hatch's decision to redo Galactica 1980. He is currently working with Todd Moyer in an attempt to bring back Galactica on his own. "Who does he think he is?" Larson stated. "I worked damn hard to make Galactica 1980 what it was. If he thinks he can recapture the magic we had in '80, he's got another thing coming." "Yeah," Moyer agreed. "He's in way over his head if he's going to do a project like that. I should know. I did Wing Commander, and look how Wing Commander turned out!"

Hatch is already working on the script for an up-to-date Galactica 1980. Not everything is certain, but he says it will likely feature a new generation of Super Scouts using their super powers to battle bank robbers, muggers, and other evil baddies while attempting to prevent the general population of Earth from finding out about the Galactica's presence. The original cast will also probably appear. "Most of the original characters were dead when Galactica 1980 came around, but that doesn't necessarily have to stop them from appearing. Starbuck, Apollo, Sheba, Cassiopea, Bojay, and Tigh could always pop up and say they're from the Ship Of Lights."

A name for the movie has not been decided yet. "Of course, it couldn't be called Galactica 1980. We'll have to come up with a new title, something that appeals to the child in all of us. It's already been decided that in the past 20 years the Galactica still has not revealed itself to Earth, and the Cylons still haven't discovered the planet. Exactly how this will be explained isn't certain, but I can promise everyone the answer will be simplistic enough that anyone under the age of 5 will be able to understand."

Despite the change of direction, Hatch insists he is more excited than ever about bringing back Galactica. "The biggest issue was always raising the money. Not anymore. This may turn out to be one of the cheapest science fiction movies ever made. Neither the Galactica nor any other spaceships will actually be seen. Like the witch that you never actually see in 'The Blair Witch Project', it's the power of looking out into the night and seeing nothing, but knowing deep down that something is really out there."

Jack Stauffer, who played Bojay in the original series, was available for comment about Richard's announcement. "Hmmm... Could be interesting... Tell me... Is Richard feeling all right?"

Hatch believes the movie will be completed in time to be previewed at the Galactica 1980 Twenty Yahren Reunion to be held in January 2000 in Los Angeles. He insists his new vision of Galactica will propel it to new heights in the next century. "Even if the movie itself bombs, the merchandising possibilities would still be enormous. Look out, Power Rangers... Here we come!"

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In the slightest chance you missed the disclaimer in the beginning...

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JUST KIDDING!!!


Enter Sheba's Galaxy